"For I had requested it of my Father"

Can I just begin by saying how much I love the scriptures?

Yesterday at work, an interesting conversation went on about "smooching". My boss commented, "I think smooching is fun!" I then openly expressed that I agreed, but was then taken aback by a comment from a co-worker.
"This coming from the girl who didn't want to kiss anyone before becoming engaged?"
Her reaction startled me, and I felt the need to defend myself. I told her that the decision not to kiss or be kissed by anyone until becoming engaged was a decision I had made WITH the Lord, and I would rather not receive criticism for it. That brought a long, silent lull in conversation. After a few minutes, she said to me, "I just thought it was funny that you didn't kiss Jarron till you were engaged, yet you like kissing." She sounded apologetic, so I proceeded to tell her my story of why that decision was made. I told her that while on my mission I had a lot of long conversations with the Lord, especially while being sick (or being humbled... whichever works). In one of these conversations, I told the Lord I didn't want to play around and date whoever, whenever, just for the sake of dating. I didn't want to kiss a million frogs in order to find prince charming. So the Lord and I made a deal, that if I waited to kiss until engagement, He would send me someone that would support me in this promise with the Lord, and wouldn't try to make me lower this standard. And sure enough He did. The Lord always keeps his promises.
In this experience I was reminded of the personal relationship that I have with my Father in Heaven. His awareness of me and of my life is always present, and I know He is there. We have a fun relationship, which often is full of , "You should stop worrying. Just trust me.... Really, stop worrying... STOOOOOP." That is  a pretty often occurrence. But my respect for Him as my Father, as my God is a profound thing. It is a humble reminder of  how much I am loved by such a Perfect being.
Upon coming home from work, I opened my scriptures and read a verse in Jacob 7, in the Book of Mormon. Here, Jacob is confronted by Sherem, who is leading astray many of the people with his claims of "no Christ". Sherem is smitten with a curse, by the Lord's will, and upon his deathbed, he shares his real testimony, he "confessed the Christ" (vs. 17) , and said that he had "been deceived by the power of the devil" (vs. 18).
In verses 21-22 Jacob continues this story saying, " And when the multitude had witnessed that he spake these things as he was about to give up the ghost, they were astonished exceedingly, insomuch that the power of God came down upon them, and they were overcome that they fell to the earth... Now this thing was pleasing unto me, Jacob, for I had requested it of my Father who was in heaven; for he had heard my cry and answered my prayer." (Emphasis added)

That was exactly what I had experienced yesterday. Minus the falling of people. I saw, once again, how the Lord had heard and answered my prayer. As I read this, it caught my attention that Jacob uses the word MY to describe the Father. The Father has obviously become a very personal Father to Jacob, beyond what I believe we can comprehend unless we experience such growth in relationship ourselves.
I don't want to say that my relationship with my Father in Heaven is equal to Jacob's, because I have a lot of things I still need to work on, but I believe that such a relationship is possible. Not only possible, but encouraged. We are constantly being encouraged to strengthen our relationship with the Father and the Son. We cannot get to the Father though, unless we go through His Son, Jesus Christ.

My hope is that we all can say "My Father" in a way that displays our love for Him, our respect for His power and Authority, and our commitment to live His way.

Families are Forever

I don't know if we can ever fully comprehend the magnitude of the statement "Families are Forever". But I have experienced, in my short life, moments when it seems to penetrate deeper into my heart the real meaning of this. Such moments came quite frequently while I served my mission, but they were nothing compared to the few moments I've experienced since being married two and a half weeks.
The first came when, while kneeling at the alter of the temple, the sealer told us that our children were there, surrounding that alter, and that thus they would be born under the covenant. What joy filled my heart when I heard those words! A paragraph from my patriarchal blessing immediately came to mind and I knew that this was a part of the fulfillment of the promises and blessings I can receive according to my faithfulness.
The second, and perhaps an even stronger feeling of the magnitude of that statement, came when we were sitting in church in California, a few days after being married, on our honeymoon. We went to a spanish branch there in Santa Ana, and someone shared that phrase in their talk. My heart began to swell, and as I glanced at my new husband sitting beside me, I felt ready to burst. We had done it. We were sealed. We had taken the first step in becoming an eternal family. Without the added distractions of the marriage day, I was able to feel more fully a sense of what that meant.
As the weeks have passed, similar moments have struck me often, and have touched my heart. Yet I still sense that I have much to learn about Eternal Families, and their role in the Lord's divine plan. I know with all my heart that they are central to God's plan, and that we CAN be together again as family units. Anything else I can learn about Eternal Families will be added to this testimony that I have had since my youth. My testimony and conviction for this statement will continue to grow, I would imagine especially after having children.
Words cannot express how excited I am to continue in this journey, and together with Jarron build an Eternal Family.

I love the two generations of love captured in this picture.
My parents in the back, sharing a kiss, and my husband and I
sharing our first dance as husband and wife.

Photo cred: Rezzen Photography

Be Still, My Soul

LIFE. There are times when it almost seems too much to handle. Almost. The past few weeks have been like that. I've been going full-time to school and planning a wedding that will take place TOMORROW. (What am I doing on a blog, right? Don't I have last minute things I need to get done?) Well, if we don't take the time to stop and smell the roses, soon the thorns get so big that the roses are nearly impossible to get to... nearly. That is the beauty of LIFE. Making sure we keep ourselves in check enough to trim off the thorns regularly, so that we can always smell the sweet aroma of roses.

The Lord has been testing my patience in his timing and my willingness to submit myself to his will. In the mission, my companion and I worked with the Lord to control our area. To make sure investigators got to church on time, to make sure the bishop's needs were met, to make sure everything was in order. After all, the Lord's house is a house of ORDER.
Coming home has been hard in that aspect. Now there are many other influences in life, making me lose hold of the majority of things.

Its been a tad stressful.
Okay, maybe a lot.

With so many factors playing, it gets chaotic. School, work, moving, homework, wedding, and religious obligations, it's hard to balance it all.. and when one little thing falls out of place, suddenly the whole table looks like it'll fall to pieces. That's where the Lord is testing me. In that moment when the table starts to tilt, and things start to move around, and i'm losing hold on the table and fearing that it will all fall off and to the ground and I wont have the power to pick it up. Sometimes even, it's tipped so far I've had to reach for those things that have fallen off the table before they crash to the ground.

But they have yet to fall to the ground.

That's why the Lord is so good. He pushes us just enough to make us not comfortable, and then he teaches us a lesson, and then things fall back into place. Wouldn't it all be easier if we could just stay in line with the will of the Lord? Why is it that we as humans have such a hard time staying in line with His will?

Someone I admire very much had the same question. Nephi said,
"O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath visited men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions? And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?" (Book of Mormon; 2 Nephi 4:26-27)

His questions have struck me so much that I haven;t been able to move on to the next chapter. I've been stuck in the second half of this chapter for a week! In my pondering, I've realized that the word "enemy" as Nephi uses towards the end doesn't always mean a person who is an enemy. My personal enemy is time. I feel like it is always too fast or too slow or simply not enough.
Again the question: "Why am I angry because of mine enemy?"
It hits me every time I read it. Why? Why am I angry? Is not the time I've been given FROM THE LORD good enough?

Later in the same chapter, Nephi reaffirms what I am constantly reminding myself of,
"O Lord, I have trusted in thee, and I will trust in thee forever. I will not put my trust in the arm of flesh; for I know that cursed is he that putteth his trust in the arm of flesh. Yea, cursed is he that putteth his trust in man or maketh flesh his arm. Yea, I know that God will give liberally to him that asketh... yea, I will cry unto thee, my God, the rock of my righteousness. Behold, my voice shall forever ascend up unto thee, my rock and mine everlasting God. Amen." (Book of Mormon; 2 Nephi 4: 34-35)

Oh how I wish I were as Nephi of old! With such unwavering faith in his God! Yet, Nephi admits here that he struggled at times keeping in line with the Lord's will. 
My wish is that we all can be a little more like Nephi, in admitting that we have to do better, and that we can ONLY do it through the power of God. Through the Atonement of Jesus Christ. Through love and patience and submissiveness.
Be still, not only my soul, but all souls. The Lord IS on your side.

Hope for Tomorrow

This morning while getting ready, I began to feel the burden of my crazy life right now weighing down on me. I have been so busy lately that I have felt that I have no time to really study my scriptures like I did in the mission. I hurry and read and write down a few things and really... I don't feel like I get that much out of it.

So this morning, as I found myself with a few more minutes to spare, I sat down and read a short chapter in the Book of Mormon. It was 1 Nephi 6. A short chapter where Nephi describes his purpose in writing the plates. Did I learn something completely new? No. But did I feel something new? YES. It was just a calm assurance that it would all be okay. That is why we keep going. That is why we keep on keeping on even though it may be hard. That is why we persevere in the Gospel, as hard as it may seem to do so. The gospel is not a burden, it is a blessing! Keep reading scriptures, keep saying prayers, and the light and hope for tomorrow will come! We are of worth in the Lord's eyes.

After I read, I still had about 15 minutes, so I logged onto my laptop to check my Weber State summer semester information, and felt prompted instead to get on LDS.ORG. I found a video that I have seen before, but this morning it touched me in a different light. God knows our struggles! AS MAN IS, GOD ONCE WAS. HE understands us. I promise!

The video is called Mountains to Climb.

There are two things that I loved from this video:

"If the foundation of faith is not embedded in our hearts, the power to endure will crumble."

"Acting on even a twig of faith allows God to grow it."

http://reflectionsofchrist.myshopify.com/

I hope that those who are struggling physically, mentally, or emotionally, may be able to find hope for tomorrow in the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. 

Have we not reason to rejoice?

"If we have faith in Jesus Christ, the hardest, as well as the easiest of times in life will be pleasant." 

Hang on strong, HOPE IS THERE.

Anxiously (and Happily) Engaged

In my last interview with my mission president, he gave me some advice that has changed my world. We were talking about marriage, and how to choose an ETERNAL companion. He told me "Sister Arave, when the Lord says jump, JUMP.!!"
I knew what he meant. When I finally meet him, and the Lord tells us to "take the plunge" we need to jump with all our might and trust in the Lord. Then, teary and emotional and NOT wanting to leave his uplifting presence, I asked one last question: If he would be there when I got sealed. He had less than a year left as a mission president, and I wasn't planning on getting married that soon! With tears in his own eyes, he replied, "IF I am there, I would be honored to be there. But don't wait for Sister Willard and I. You need to jump!"
The spirit struck me, and I knew I would be getting married before July of the next year. I knew it.

My first Tuesday home, my dear friend Karley took me to institute. I was nervous, and not comfortable being around so much ENGLISH! But there was a cute young man with long eyelashes that sat behind me... The next week he sat there again. I learned he served in Mexico. I wanted to marry someone that spoke spanish! :)
A few weeks went by, and we were talking quite often. As we began to spend more and more time together, we both were open in discussing where we thought the relationship could go. He told me that if this was going to end up in marriage, that he wanted to wait four seasons and a road trip. As soon as he told me that, I thought "Welp, if this is the one I need to marry, that'll change! And if it's not right, we wont even get that far!"
Then I gave him my own expectations: I wouldn't kiss him till we were engaged... if an engagement was in the Lord's plan for us. That was something I felt very strong about doing, and I was not about to back down. If Jarron wasn't okay with it, then I would know it wasn't right to be with him. He surprised me by telling me how impressed he was that I would be willing to wait to kiss someone. He was on board with it all. It seemed we had reached our agreement!

Needless to say, around Christmastime, as we said goodnight in the driveway, he said "I've been thinking about something... If the Lord does tell us to jump, we can forget the whole four seasons and a road trip thing."
A few weeks later, I had my answer. He had received a short time before I had received mine, and now, on February 13, 2016, here we stand, engaged in the greatest work of mankind.... The Plan of Salvation!

Here's to eternity! We both work in the temple with the Spanish session and it has been such a blessing to grow together in our service in the temple. We have chosen June 16th to be sealed for time and all eternity here in the temple we work in, the Ogden Utah Temple.
Also, that first kiss was worth the wait. ;)

Have we not GREAT reason to rejoice?